Now I See You by Nicole C. Kear

Author:Nicole C. Kear
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Netgalley
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Published: 2014-06-24T05:00:00+00:00

Tip #12: On stepping in it

Prepare to step in a lot of shit. I am speaking literally here. The world is full of canine excrement and when you can’t see out of the corner of your eye, there’s no way to maneuver around it. This is an unpleasant fact of blind life.

Walking in dogshit, however, will seem positively delightful after you’ve slipped on the carcass of a dead animal. Like uncollected dog turds, sidewalks accumulate a rather revolting amount of roadkill—rats, squirrels, pigeons—and unless you shuffle around with your eyes glued to the pavement like a little old lady, eventually you’re going to place your foot right inside some slimy, flattened pigeon intestines.

I have no advice to prevent this; I’m just giving you a heads-up so you can get yourself used to the idea. I do suggest, though, that you avoid sinking too much money into footwear, so that when it does happen and you’re hopping around the street shrieking, “HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, MY FEET ARE FUCKING COVERED IN RAT GUTS!” you won’t feel guilty about tossing those shoes into the nearest trash can.

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